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Thursday, December 13, 2012

What is Marriage: He's predictable and I'm not.



Earlier this week, I read somewhere that kids thrive on regular schedule and routine. I immediately felt a little alarm go off when I remembered that consistency is not my strong point. In love and support, sure, but in scheduling and daily activity? No way.

I get up at a different time every morning. Left to my own devices, I would take a shower, make coffee, and walk Herbie at different times every day of the week, no rhyme or reason. Sometimes I would make time for breakfast, but mostly I wouldn't. I would never, ever make lunch to take to work, and I'm usually running just late enough to make it a little bit stressful. I like to think that my approach to routines is part of my creative appeal. :) I get everything done, but never the same way twice.

John's exactly the opposite. He gets sleepy at the same time each night. He wakes up at the same time each morning. He performs his morning rituals in precisely the same order each day. He told me that if he deviates, even a little, he falls behind and can't catch up. His routine includes showering, making coffee, taking Herbie out, making breakfast, and making lunch for both of us (I'm really lucky). He also does everything with a quick efficiency that I've never known. Meanwhile, I'm probably still upstairs trying to figure out which tights to wear.

I like the way that my creative unpredictability counteracts John's methodical style. It's good for both of us to have the other. On Monday, though, I started wondering what this might mean for a kid - a little human, who craves stability and regularity, at the mercy of my spontaneity and what I'm sure will be creative mothering.

John said that between both of us, our child will have a nice balance. I think (hope) he's right. His predictability makes him comforting, and so stable. He'll be such a good, unwavering dad. I'll always be there supporting, too, but I'll also be sneaking our kid a cupcake at midnight and showering him with hug wars (is that a thing?), doing my best to keep things exciting. 



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